It is quite funny that as am about to leave mica..the situation is almost the same as IIMC.The uncertainity is not there as i have a safe job as they say , it is just like i had the call from mica 2 years back.31st march was a turning point at IIMC , i had my farewell that day and again 31st is the last day here.it could have been the first of april , but no it is the same date.
Everything else is almost the same , i have a set a good friends , family backgrounds different from those at IIMC, but still connecting at some level.The discomfort and hopelessness that i felt two years ago is still there, but the cause is different atleast.Should i be happy or sad about how things repeat themselves in my life.I guess i've written about it earlier too, but then this is what provokes me again and again ti lay open my heart...
I was not mocked at IIMC, maybe a little for my naivety, but it is for more petty things here.I've stayed with people longer but they have not tried to understand me...maybe i did not try much either...Being alone at this point of time is killing..work will keep me sane..hopefully.....The messenger..orkut windows blob up and down every few minutes and i have to shut those windows of hope and despair to concentrate on work....and forget, or atleast hope for it
Again isn't it a co incidence that i want to go to the library to find peace on sunday night when it is closed !!...repetition..deja vu..sadness..despair..yet i think iam lucky that i can love and care for a lot of people and will always do so.It may be a weakness..but it's better than many others.It's better to hurt self than others..but am no coward..am perceptive..am not shrewd and cunning and do not try to translate a maybe into a possibility if i think i'll have to be some one else or lie..or maybe it is plain laziness...god knows...